My Voice. Your Voice.

When God said, Speak, I didn't know what he meant.
Since that time, I have...
WRITTEN MY STORY
STOOD IN FRONT OF GROUPS OF WOMEN AND SHARED ABOUT  GOD'S TRANSFORMING LOVE, ABOUT FEAR, BEING RESTLESS, WAITING,  AND WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE TO CHOOSE HIM
LED AND PARTICIPATED IN BIBLE STUDIES
COUNSELED AND PRAYED WITH FRIENDS
I know these were all a part of God's plan.  Each time, I believed these were what he meant when he said, Speak. I still do.
But, today, I met with a friend and she said this, I don't feel like a have a voice [in that place]. But, you do.  You have a voice.
At that moment, the hair on my arms stood. I felt overwhelmed.  Yes. That's part of it, too. Speak. Use your voice.

Everyone has a voice. 
When the time comes and God says, Speak, Do it. Use your voice.
Be intentional about influencing others. In your time. In your place.

Speak

This weekend I will have an amazing, and frightening, opportunity. I was fortunate to be asked by Jennifer Smith, author of Wife After God and creator of the site Unveiled Wife, to join her in a meet and greet and motivational session, which takes place on Saturday in Southern Ca. This is the amazing part.

The frightening part. I was also asked to write an encouraging and supportive letter to weary wives...and read it aloud at the event. The writing part was easy. It is the speaking part that has me a little worried.
I am not a public speaker. In fact, it is one of my least favorite things. Although I speak in meetings at work all the time, being on a stage, in front of a large group, that's terrifying.
That being said, when Jen asked me to be a part of the event, I did not hesitate. I felt God nudging me toward to move beyond my comfort zone. Almost immediately, I remembered what He had spoken to me while attending a women's retreat in Hume Lake, last October:  keep going, don't give up, speak. At the time, I needed the encouragement of the first two, but was uncertain what He meant by the third. Speak. With this in mind, and in light of my word for 2014, how could I say no to this opportunity? I couldn't.
Since you won't be able to attend the event, I plan to post a link to the letter I wrote, which will be published at Unveiled Wife on Monday. So, stay tuned.
Please pray for me, as I speak to these women the words that God gave me to help strengthen their weary minds, bodies and souls. Also, pray for all the women who attend, that they will be encouraged and uplifted by the experience.

Stand Firm

I know there is brokenness in the world. I know there are people who are struggling. But, my perspective has changed drastically since I began offering to pray for others who are broken.

Last week, I wrote an article for Unveiled Wife about protecting your marriage. At the end of the article I offered for readers to email me their prayer requests regarding their marriage. The response I got was unexpected.

The day the article came out I got two emails. The next morning, I had four more. And, they just kept coming. All day. All week.

Emails from all over the world. From women and men who were hurting in their life because of difficulties in their marriages. Story after story of brokenness and a need for prayer. I felt both saddened and honored. I was devastated by the thought that so many people were hurting. I also felt blessed (and a little overwhelmed) that God had sent these people to me, allowing me to pray for them and their marriages.

There have been times when I have not offered prayer because I am afraid that no one will respond, or if they do that my prayers will no be sufficient. But, it's not about me. It's about God and how He wants to use me. If He desires it, it will be and He will be sufficient.

I have been up early many mornings lately. During that time when my house is quiet, I have been trying to take the opportunity not to be busy, but to rest. To read, pray and write about what God is teaching me. The morning after the article, I was awake and was led to pray this, "Lord, if you desire for me to be a part of something bigger than myself, lead me there. Show me what you desire." Within an hour, the emails came. I had my answer.

Although you don't know these women and men by name or their stories, I ask that you would join me as I pray for them. Pray for broken, and in some case, shattered, marriages. Pray for me, as well. That God would continue to use me for His will and that I would follow his lead.

I am convinced that the closer we get to God, the more Satan attacks. He is uncomfortable with this closeness and wants to see us perish. I have experienced this first hand. Since I have begun writing about God and sharing the desires of my heart so openly, I have had more periods of stress and anxiety and doubt. It is important in these times to continue to seek God, not to become angry with him or forget him.

Be on guard. Stand firm in the faith. Be courageous. Be strong.

1 Corinthians 16:13

Put on all of God’s armor so that you will be able to stand firm against all strategies of the devil.

Ephesians 6:11

It is like a person building a house who digs deep and lays the foundation on solid rock. When the floodwaters rise and break against that house, it stands firm because it is well built.

Luke 6:48

Will you stand firm in Christ with me?

Fixed

When I was a kid, I was taught to fold my hands and close my eyes when I pray. The children's pastor at our church teaches the same, expressing to the kids that we need to keep ourselves, and our fiends, distraction free when we are talking to God.
Last month, I attend a women's retreat. The speakers there asked us to take a different posture for prayer. We were to open our hands, so as to receive what God would give and ask for His response during our conversations with Him. I am not and have never been an overly charismatic Christian. It is not something I am against, it is just something I have never been completely comfortable with. However, the idea of inviting God to speak to me, to find out what He wants from me, is appealing to me. I have been making an effort to receive in prayer, with open hands, ever since.

This idea of receiving from God also came up a few Sundays ago during a sermon. The message centered around Luke 11:38-42, the story of Mary and Martha. The main idea was this, to sit at Jesus' feet is to be submitted to His instruction. To be totally dependent and ready to receive whatever it is that Jesus has to give. That is the goal.

When I fix my eyes on all that you are, then every doubt I feel, deep in my heart grows strangely dim. 

Strangely Dim, Francesca Battistelli

So, how do we do that? How do we give Jesus our undivided attention in a life that is full of distractions?

To fix our eyes on Jesus means to look intently at him. To be steadfast in putting our minds on things of Heaven, so that we can be ready to receive all that God has for us.

So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. 

- 2 Corinthians 4:18

In order to get to know someone, we need to spend time with them. My desire is to take time for Jesus. To fix my eyes and mind on Him. To find a place of rest in Him. I want Him to speak to me. I want to receive all that he has for me.

Into the Light

I have so many things to tell you about. 
So many incredible stories to share about the women's retreat I attended last weekend. 
However, I am having trouble putting my thoughts into words. I want to express it well and just haven't had enough time to reflect on all that occurred. It is coming. Soon. I promise.

Today, I want to explain what happened before the retreat and what God had me share with the twelve women in my group.

Prior to last year's retreat, I prepared something for each woman in my group about the meaning of their name. I presented each woman with a piece of paper, which described the origin and meaning of their name and challenged them to think about how or if they were a reflection of this meaning.

Since many of the same women were attending the retreat again, this year, I wanted to do something different. I wracked my brain, but couldn't think of anything. Then, I did what I should have done first. I prayed.

And, God gave me an answer. Every time I prayed I thought of this song, Marvelous Light. This is not a new song, and I couldn't remember the last time I had sung it, so I knew it must mean something more to God than it did to me.

I read and reread the lyrics of this song. Then, I searched the Bible for a verse that I felt reflected the theme of the song. The verse that I was led to was 1 Peter 2:9:

But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.

The next challenge I faced was how to present this verse in a creative way. That's when I thought of Mandy of This Girl's Life. I have followed Mandy on Instagram for awhile and admire her creativity. So, I contacted her and asked if she would be willing to create a custom print based on the verse I had chosen.

I was thrilled when she said yes, and even more excited when she sent me the finished print.

I decided to frame a print for each woman in my group. I found very inexpensive frames at Wal Mart (thanks to this post by Kaitlyn) and spray painted them white.

(If you follow me on Instagram, you saw that I was still finishing the painting and framing two hours before leaving for the retreat.)

I was completely satisfied with the finished product. It was a great keepsake that each woman seemed to appreciate.

Throughout the time I was preparing this gift, I wondered how this verse would relate to the theme of the retreat and what it would mean to each woman who received it. During our third meeting of the weekend, the speaker shared how God had led her through a tragedy, a dark time. Through her circumstances, she felt that God had taught her three main lessons. The last one was, "Walk in the light."

Although I had felt God leading me to 1 Peter 2:9, I had never been more convinced then at that moment, when the speaker spoke those four words.

My friends, God is alive and active. He speaks to me and He can speak to you, if you will allow Him.

***

If you would like to have a copy of the print Mandy designed, you can purchase it in her Etsy shop. Or, for a chance to get it for free, enter to win it here.
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Walking Through

Has fear ever caused you to do crazy things? Things that are out of character for you?

My first week of summer vacation did not go as I had planned. Instead of enjoying our new freedom and the beautiful weather, I was stuck inside all week with two sick kids, a lot of Lysol, and an abundance of anxiety. 

I won't go into details about the week, except to say that it was very difficult for me. I struggle with anxiety in many areas. Unfortunately, I experienced one of my extreme phobias last week. Is it irrational? Yes. Yet, it is still real. For me.

This anxiety made it very difficult for me to sleep. One night, when I experienced this anxiety-induced insomnia, I wrote the following...

***

I have experienced paralyzing fear this week. Fear of the unknown. Fear that is irrational and crazy. So much fear that I have not been able to sleep, eat or even leave the house without panic.

In fact, as I write this, I should be in bed. Sleeping. But, instead, the place that should bring me calm and rest is a place where I experience the most anxiety, which is both emotional and physical. 

I read until I finish my book. Until I am sure I can fall asleep, but it does not work.

So, I pace. Around the kitchen. I pass my Bible. I should pick it up, but I am afraid to even do that. Finally, the call to do it is so great. I search "fear" in the index and concordance. I find these:

"Don't be afraid," he said. "Take courage! I am here!" (Mark 6:50)

...but he called out to them, "Don't be afraid. I am here." (John 6:20)

The Lord who created you says, don't be afraid...I have called you by name, you are mine... (Isaiah 43)

I also read John 14:27. About the gift of peace of "mind and heart" that Jesus has given to me. God says to me, "Accept this peace. Allow it to fill you."

Then, I flip to Philippians 4:6,7. Whenever you start to worry, stop and pray. The words my husband said to me earlier in the day resonate with me, "Have you prayed about this?"

I am worn out, weak, exhausted, broken. God says, "This is not what I want you to be."

***

Although it is a new week, and life is beginning to return to normal, I am still walking through my anxiety. I'm not sure how long it will take to leave me. I have asked God to lift this burden from me, many times. Yet, I keep taking it back. It is within my power to release it. In it's entirety. So, why am I still holding on? I must let go. Completely.

It is time to turn my ...

Worries into prayers.

Anxiety into petitions.

Suffering into thankfulness.

Limitations into requests.

Uncertainties into opportunities to listen.

The One Year Plan

Last week I wrote about the importance of progressing beyond the past, of moving forward. One of the things that had me stuck was the what, how and when of choosing a plan that would enable me to read the entire Bible. In typical me fashion, when there is something that I am afraid of, I either try to push it out of my mind or head straight into it, with a force greater than may actually be necessary.

Once I knew that keeping this out of my mind wasn't working, it became bigger than I could have imagined. Let me explain...

Since early October, I have felt called to begin a women's Bible study. In fact, this is one of those things that God continued to bring up to me in our conversations, no mattered how much I tried to ignore Him.

Over time, He gave me the names of several women to include in this study. Still, I did nothing. I just couldn't find make the time. I also had so many questions and concerns. What did I know about the Bible that I could teach to others? When and where would we meet? What would we study?

Then last Monday, after I wrote the It's in the Past post, it came to me. I needed to combine God's desire for me to lead a study of the Bible with my desire to read through the Bible this year.

So, I wrote, and rewrote, a message to the 10 women that God had put on my heart, inviting them to join me in reading the Bible this year. Part of this study will include weekly messages of encouragement and accountability from me, to the group. (I told you it was big.) We will also meet together, as a group. While we won't be meeting weekly or even monthly, I am planning to gather the group several times during the year, to discuss the Bible, to socialize, eat, and pray together. I am excited (and, yes, a little scared) that God has called me to lead this group.

Even though all the women I approached with this idea were not able to participate, all were appreciative of my efforts and realized the importance of my call. I did not feel rejected. I did not feel self-conscious. This could only be God, since the potential for me to experience failure, without Him, is always great.

I don't know all the details. This is uncharted territory for me. Yet, I am trusting God. He has led me this far and I know He will continue to lead, as long as I am willing to follow. I have hope. There will be blessings.

If you would like to follow us through the Bible this year, we will be using the One Year Bible plan through You Version. We are beginning Monday, January 14th. 

While I know that most of you readers do not live close enough to physically be a part of this group, if you would like to be encouraged and led through this study, please email me at peaceitalltogether@gmail.com and I will include you in the group's correspondence.

Now, in the words of Paul, from 2 Corinthians 13:14, "May the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all."

That Still, Small Voice

The Sovereign LORD has given me his words of wisdom,

so that I know how to comfort the weary.

Morning by morning he wakens me

and opens my understanding to his will. - Isaiah 50:4 (NLT)

Have you ever thought that God was speaking to you? I have felt the nudging of the Lord before, but never as much in the past six months. What has changed? Has He just decided that He is now ready to communicate with me? Honestly, I think He was always ready. It was me who wasn't.

If you've been reading this blog, you have heard the story of the beginning, when I first began following the urgings of Holy Spirit. In April, I began praying more, searching for answers, and really listening to what God was telling me. Since that time, I have attempted to follow Him more closely. Each time I feel Him speaking to me, which usually comes through an inner voice, I have tried to be obedient.

But, how do you know if the words you're hearing are truly from God? I have heard several messages or sermons on this exact question in my lifetime. The overwhelming theme has been...if it aligns with the Bible and biblical principles, then it is probably from God. While, this is a good starting point, I have put together a list of things that have helped me differentiate between my own random, sometimes crazy, thoughts and those that I believe the Holy Spirit has given to me.

Obedience

If you love me, obey my commandments. - John 14:15 (NLT)

If I am being truly honest, I would say that I have had many thoughts about making a phone call, sending an email or message, or giving a word of encouragement to others, but did not often do them. Since I began developing this desire to "do more" I have adopted the Nike motto. Just do it. Instead of holding back and second-guessing, I have decided to put my thoughts into actions. The phrase, "it's the thought that counts," no longer applies to me.

What I have found is that the more I follow this mantra, the more I am used by God. He speaks to me more. Since the urging of this inner voice does not go against what I believe to be right and true, I can only conclude that since I started doing more, God has further entrusted me with even more acts of love.

Blessings

You will experience all these blessings if you obey the LORD your God...

Wherever you go and whatever you do, you will be blessed. Deuteronomy 28:2, 6 (NLT)

Although getting blessings has not been the motivation for my actions, I have developed better friendships, received more compliments, and am feeling more loved by others, since this journey began. My conclusion: To be used by God is to experience the blessings of being loved. Yes, people have and will continue to be persecuted for their faith. Following God's plan is not all sunshine and roses. But, recently, I have been blessed by my choice to be a blessing.

Fellowship

For where two or three gather together as my followers, I am there among them.” - Matthew 18:20 NLT

The term "coincidence" has always puzzled me in relation to my faith. By definition, this means that there are things that happen by chance, by accident. I don't know if that is true. Most recently...

I had been thinking of making changes to my blog. I wanted to change it's appearance, to make it more eye catching, more of an expression of me. Also, I desired to get my message to more people, and thought a fresh design might help with that vision. I hadn't talked to M about it, mainly because I knew I couldn't do a redesign myself, which would mean hiring someone, which would mean spending money. So, I researched it, thought about it some, and prepared how I was going to sell this idea to M. Funny thing is, when I brought it up to him, he had been researching it, too and was trying to figure out how to bring it up to me. This was no coincidence. I believe God was there, putting it all together, orchestrating the whole thing.

Ignore It

Listen to my instruction and be wise. Don’t ignore it. Proverbs 8:33 (NLT)

Okay. Okay. I get the message...don't ignore words from the Lord. Although I have been trying to live a Nike-esque life, there has been one thing that I believe the Holy Spirit is prompting me to do, and I have been ignoring it, for over a month. Ignoring it because I'm scared, because it would be a lot of work, because I don't want to fail, and the list goes on. But, my plan to ignore it is not working. That still, small voice keeps returning. It's clearly God, urging me to trust, to step out, and to stop ignoring Him. I hope that I can, soon.


This list is not exhaustive. I know there are more ways to be led by the Spirit. There are also many more things that I wish God would speak to me about. To provide me with answers. As long as I continue to seek Him, I have to believe that He will. 

I would love to know how God speaks or has spoken to you. Write a comment or send me a message. Also, be watching for a guest post this week from my friend, Becca, and you will see how God is speaking to her.