Open to Interpretation

Last Saturday, M and I had a date night. It was wonderful!

One of the things I love about our date nights is getting dressed up. This is especially fun for me in the summer months, when I am not getting ready for work (or for anything, really) every day.

For Saturday's date, I was excited to wear my new black maxi dress and some fun new accessories.

This is the only photo I have from the evening. Oops.

The other thing I enjoy about date nights, is the ability to sit across the table from my husband, eat a meal, and have meaningful, uninterrupted conversation.

Most of our conversation on Saturday night centered around communication. We were discussing how different we are in the method and content of our communication, specifically in the context of our marriage.

While we are not the kind of couple that hash out each and every irritation or annoyance, we are also not the type to carry burdens and bitterness over weeks and months. Our communication falls somewhere in the middle. And, depending on the situation or concern, we are turn-takers with initiating this type of confrontational communication.

As a result of our discussion, we concluded that the way communication is received is dependent on the emotional, physical, etc. state of the person who is receiving it. To illustrate this point, M used an example from earlier in our evening, when we were getting ready to go.

I had asked his opinion about my necklace. His comment was neither negative nor overly positive. But, being a little self-conscious, I decided to try some other necklace options. Ultimately, none of them was what I wanted, so I went back to the original.

M's point about that situation was that even though I had responded to his comment, by looking for other options, I was not hurt or offended by it. However, on a different day or at a different time, I could have been.

It would have been easy for me to start a negative thought process...He hates the necklace. He thinks I look awful. Why are we even going out? But, for whatever reason, I didn't.

There are times when a person's words are meant to hurt. But, there are also times when words are just words and we interpret them to mean something that wasn't a part of their original intention.

This statement, by Beth Moore, was in my Bible study last week:

Because Satan has a limited leash where believers are concerned, his most powerful 

tactics are psychological. Though he can't posses our minds, he profoundly and 

destructively influences our thoughts.

I have been working hard not to let Satan control my thoughts, to focus on God's thoughts about me and about my marriage and relationships.

In another study, Wife after God, a 30-day devotional by the Unveiled Wife, the author said it this way:

God created you in His image...You were made as a representation, to reflect God's goodness, and to radiate His love...You were divinely designed by the creator of the universe, you were inspired by Him, and you were made with purpose.

If you and I interpret the words of others, the situations of this world and our daily lives with that knowledge, we can live with a sense of value and purpose. 

It is only when we are able to hear and see ourselves differently, that we will hear and see others differently too.