I have lived in numerous pits. I decorated them and tried to make them appear pretty. At times, I truly believed I had it going on. I thought I was doing life well during these high times.
You see, I grew up without a father and my mother was more concerned with her life. I dealt with various abuses and I struggled with self worth. I searched everywhere I could to find someone to love me. As a child, this meant behaving in ways that pleased everyone. I knew how to hide my pain so that I appeared to be a happy child. I became a world class people pleaser.
During my teen years, I began doing whatever it took to get attention from boys. I knew what I was doing was not right, but I did it anyway. I desperately wanted to feel loved and for a fleeing moment the boys would tell me they loved me.
A year after college I married my college sweetie and ten months later we welcomed our first child. Neither of us grew up with an example of a Godly marriage or parenting. Yep, you guessed it-we were two messes trying to squeak by. We fought often and I was always filled with jealousy. I continued to struggle with self worth. We had two more children and my self worth worsened as I began to realize that little ones relied on me. I hit rock bottom and believed the lie that I was a burden to my family. I thought that any other woman would be a better fit for my children and husband. I wrote a suicide note and intended to free my family of me.
Jesus had another plan all together. My husband came home and found me crying on the floor. He scooped me up and held me while I cried. His compassion and love were so evident. They gave me something I had never felt before-hope. Within two weeks, an acquaintance invited me to a Bible study. I had never attended a study before and was immediately intrigued. The women I was placed with were organic Jesus lovers and openly loved all over me. They allowed me to share my mess and didn’t condemn me or throw the judgment book at me.
Little by little I began to fall head over heels in love with Jesus. I was shown a love like I had never felt before. I started to read my Bible and listen to everything I could that pertained to Jesus. My heart began to know the peace that I had heard about. I was amazed, thrilled, and filled with joy.
Jesus has filled my heart with such a passion for Him and for His children. I know what it is like to feel lonely, worthless, and rejected. I can relate to those who feel hopeless. I have such a heart for the hurting and have a strong desire to share the love that Jesus has filled me with. I promise, if He can change my life, He can change anyone’s. There is nothing that will keep Him from loving His babies!
Earlier this year, Jesus encouraged me to write a 31 day devotional for women. I titled it From Broken to Beautiful. It takes the reader on a journey to find true worth in Jesus. We are all beautiful to Him and He longs for us to know it. It is available on Amazon as a paperback or on a Kindle.
I recently started my own business so that I could share Jesus with anyone and everyone. I named it It Takes One Ministries. It takes one person to build us up or break us. Often, our self worth is determined based on these interactions. My goal is to let people know that our worth comes from the One who came to save us. Life can hurt, but Jesus will bind up our wounds and allow us to soar.
I would love for you to swing by my website and check out my blog. I hope you will grab a cup of coffee and stay a while. May you find your true worth in the One who created you to be beautiful!
Love to all-
Marci
3 comments:
Sybil, thank you for introducing us to Marcie. I can relate to her on so many levels. I love having the connection with other Christian woman and mothers who have been through what I have been through.
thank you for sharing with us! i can't wait to check out her blog and read more. what an amazing story and message.
What a beautiful ministry!!!
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