My People

This Summer I've been leading a group of women through Jennie Allen's Restless Bible Study. It has been an tremendous experience! It is my first time leading a group like this, yet I have felt the movement of the Spirit each time I prepare for a session and during each meeting. These women have truly been a blessing to me and to each other.
Last week's lesson was related to the people in our lives. The questions we were prompted to ask ourselves were - Who are the people you need? Who are the one's that need you? One of my favorite Jennie Allen quotes was in this lesson...
It is easier to survive this life on the surface, bumping up against people gently, than do the mess of intentionally loving them.  -Jennie Allen-
When I began to notice a transformation in myself and realized that God had me not only on a path to use my gifts, but on a spiritual journey as well, I was a little frustrated, wondering who in my life could support me in this place. There were probably many, although I was afraid to ask. It wasn't until I started telling my story and sharing the ways God has changed me that I found my people. And, I have found myself wanting to hold on tight - no more casual chit-chat - this is the real deal.
Two women that helped me become aware that I am not alone in this spiritual journey, I met online, through blogging. Tiffany and Julie are two of the writers for the blog Girls of God's Heart and Tiffany has her own blog, His Constant Grace. 
I remember the excitement I felt when I first connected the dots and discovered that both Tiffany and Julie lived in my area. It has been such an incredible blessing to study the Bible with them, to share in their lives, and even travel with them - we went to see Beth Moore together in June...amazing!
Part of the people study this past week was to create a list, by name, of the five people you need and the five people that need you. Tiffany and Julie are definitely on the first list, along with my husband. After that, I struggled to come up with more names. There are so many people who I would feel lost without. How could I only name five? Who are those people that I trust with my ideas and my most precious spiritual thoughts? Those are my people.
But, they're not the only ones that I need. I also need the ones who send me thank-you cards or speak words of encouragement at just the right times. I also need the ones who invite me to use my gifts in different ways. And, the ones who take walks with me, mostly because it's an hour of uninterrupted conversation, not because it's particularly strenuous exercise. Or, the ones who come to see my girls in their play. I need them all.
There have been times in my life when I've let friends walk away or I walked away myself - because they weren't the right people or it wasn't the right time. There have also been those unlikely friends and the ones I need because they needed me first. 
I've written before about the social struggles of my past. My shyness and awkwardness. What I've been learning recently is that I don't do small talk well. But, get me talking about my passions - the Lord, the Bible, my kids, my job, etc. - and I can't stop talking. The problem for me has always been that most people want to live life on the surface. They don't want to go deep. Enter in my awkwardness.

There have been many times in my life when I have wondered why I have to feel so deeply. Why I have to care so much. Why certain experiences hit me and reach me at my core. Things that may seem insignificant to others. I think it scares people sometimes. They worry about my deep feelings, extreme self-doubt and seemingly over the top reactions and fears.

But, the psalmist says...

We need deep in order to experience the Holy Spirit in it’s fullness. Without the ability to go deep, I would never have started writing again, began sharing my story and meaningfully connected with so many women in my life. I would have stayed shallow and there is only so much that can be accomplished there.

Although there can be great hurt and pain in the deep, there is also great power. There is an ability to connect with God, with myself and with others.

We have to be willing to accept it all. Otherwise, we won’t have any of it. We’ll stay shallow. And, our feet will never leave the ground.

Deep begets deep. Love begets love. Faith begets faith.

So, be intentional. Dive into the deep waters with your people. You won't regret it.