Not by Chance

Last week, I posted this verse about the way God judges us, and how it is different from the way the world judges us, and from how we judge ourselves.

In my journey through the Bible, I just finished 1 Samuel. This verse was one that I had bookmarked and labeled as, Look at the Heart. As a person who is constantly struggling with a poor self-image and broken self-confidence, I thought this would be an important verse for me to remember. 

What I didn't anticipate was what God was going to teach me last Tuesday and how He was going to make this verse real to me. 

On Tuesday, June 4th, I was scheduled to begin a new Bible study. A study with a group of women that I had met through blogging, but never met in person. I was thrilled that they had asked me to be a part of their existing group and excited to be able to study the Bible with these godly women. 

Having never met any of them in person, I was nervous. I have often written here that I am much better at interacting with people in written form than in conversation or in person. Also, while I felt like I knew so much about these women through their writings, Instagram photos, emails, and text messages, I truly did not know them at all. 

What if they were crazy? But, more importantly, what if they thought I was crazy?

Here's what happened...

The Bible study was due to begin at 6:00pm. At 5:15, I was in a carpool, just leaving a meeting in a town at least 30 minutes from my car, which was at least 20 minutes from my final destination. There was no way I was going to be on time. What you must know about me is the I am never rarely late. It is something I just can't be. I was raised to be on time early, and have not been able to deviate from that mindset as an adult. 

It makes me very anxious to be late. What will I miss? Will those waiting for me think less of me because I was not on time? Etc.

When I finally got to my car I realized that, while I had the address of my destination, I didn't know how to get there. I typed the address into my phone. Couldn't find it. It showed me the location on the map, but was not able to give me directions from my current location. More anxiety.

Then, after deciding I knew enough about the approximate location to get there, I started off on my planned route. To my surprise, the freeway, which I was intending to take, was closed. A police car was parked, blocking the entrance to the freeway on-ramp and the smiling police officer was directing traffic to continue straight. No turning. Now what? 

While I have lived in this town most of my life, my familiarly with this particular area is lacking and my sense of direction is horrible. I was going to have to take the surface streets. It would be a slow and tedious drive.

At the next every stoplight, I checked my reflection in the mirror, noting that most of my makeup was gone and I had bags under my eyes. Lovely.

I was also hungry. Having been in a meeting, or in someone else's car, for the past three hours, I hadn't had a chance to eat anything. Since I knew it would be awhile before I reached my destination, where dinner would be served, I decided to eat a snack. Pineapple. 

Because I had given my daughter, who had a runny nose, the napkins that had been in my lunchbox (since I had forgotten to get tissues before we left the house, I was forced to give her what I had in the car when I dropped her off at school), I chose to keep the pineapple slices in the bag as I ate them. Bad idea. This strategy led to pineapple juice dripping down the front of my shirt. 

Could this get any worse? Could I make a worse first impression? I was late, looking haggard and covered in pineapple juice. Hi, I'm Sybil. I'm a mess. Aren't you glad you invited me to join this Bible study? 

As I began to cry, this verse, the one from 1 Samuel 16, came into my mind. The Lord gave it to me and then said, "Look at your heart. Look where you are headed. To study my word. I have great plans for you. For your heart."

The message was clear. God did not want me worrying about appearances. He didn't care that I was late, bleary eyed or smelled like pineapple. He cared that I was taking steps to study His word so that I could know him better.

I had arrived. At my destination. And, was at peace. 

I took a deep breath, apologized for being late, and put all appearances out of my mind. 

In addition to the words God spoke to me during my drive to the Bible study, here is the key phrase I jotted down in my study guide that night:

In God's providence, nothing happens by chance.

I am grateful for that truth. That God's hand is in everything...even spilled pineapple juice and freeway closures. 

Do you believe that?